They were careless people

Hello all,
I did sort of promise to keep up with this little blog a little bit better, and ya'll are not about to make me a liar! February has been complete and utter madness, in both the best and worst ways. Let us start off with the worst ways, because I always want bad news first. And since this is my blog, you are going to get the bad news first.

I've had to have some tough conversations and some of my friends have had to have similar tough conversations this month. And what has been most hurtful about those conversations is how careless people were being with our emotions. And I realize, that is not the intention at all, but nevertheless that is how it is being perceived. Above all things, friendship is so very important to me. I joke with people when I first am getting to know them that it takes me a good two years to really get to know you, and decide I like you enough to finally call you a friend. I'll let you in on a little secret though, it's not really a joke. I like to think that I take my time in getting to know others, because once I've decided you are in, you are in. And it is an extremely painful process for me to lose friends that I have cultivated such memories with over the years.

On this beautiful thing that we call life, I want to surround myself and invest in the best. And it hurts like no other when that doesn't work out. I try to make sure that my friends are not temporary items in my life. So, I may not have many, but that's fine, because I do not need many. That is why, in many cases for me, it hurts more to lose a friend then it does a relationship. For my friends are the ones that I turn to when that relationship doesn't work out. Because, 90% of the time there were red flags from the beginning that they tried to warn me about, but since I'm stubborn, I don't listen, and have to run back to them a month, or two, or three, or four later (or even a whole year, depending on how stubborn I am being) and tell them all the things that they already knew.
Because, my friends are wisest, most caring, most compassionate, most loving, most truthful, most beautiful human beings that I have ever come across. And even when I make a mistake and try to date that guy that they told me not to, when I come to my senses they are still there for me. Waiting with food and laughter, because they know the truest way to my heart.

So, when I say that I want to be friends with you and I've started to build towards that, and it seems to start taking a turn into something else, and so I shift only to find out that isn't what you wanted, nor did you have any plans to head in that direction, I'm not mourning the loss of a potential relationship. I'm mourning the loss of a potential friendship. It hurts that you were careless with my boundaries, even if you felt that you weren't or didn't intend to be, because I wanted to be friends with you for life. And now I can not trust you with that. And I am no way a perfect friend. But, I love them all the very best way that I know how and I do hope that they know that. So, when I call you a friend, just know that these words are just a fraction of what I think of you and how much I love you. Do not be careless with your friends, for you mean more to them then you know.

In conclusion, in 2018, we are no longer dealing with careless people. We are continuing to take no L's. We are continuing to stay hydrated, woke and moisturized.

love,
ktv

"I couldn't forgive him or like him, but I saw that what he had done was, to him, entirely justified. It was all very careless and confused. They were careless people, Tom and Daisy – they smashed up things and creatures and then retreated back into their money or their vast carelessness, or whatever it was that kept them together and let other people clean up the mess they had made." - Shout-out to The Great Gatsby